Vamp!Elena is my unfulfilled fanfic dream

[semele]

I've had this phase before, and I got over it. But today ever_neutral gave me some recs, and I started reading, and I'm sort of obsessed again. I was supposed to make a TVD Christmas Speculation Post, but it can wait, it's still November ;). Vamp!Elena is in my head RIGHT NOW!

Welcome back, obsession. I sort of missed you.


I'm not sure if I want Elena to be a vampire in canon, but I'm deeply in love with vamp!Elena fanfiction. Ok, I generally frown upon fics in which Elena decides to be turned because she wants to be with one of the Salvatores, and it's OMG SO EPIC LOVE, but other than that? Elena turned against her will. Elena choosing to turn, because she doesn't see any other option (like: she can't kill Klaus, but she can do something to ruin his supply of doppelganger blood). Elena dealing with transition. Elena with all her features magnified. Elena with all her issues magnified.

And her relationship with Damon? ENTIRELY NEW LEVEL! She would be furious with him. She would depend on him. He would be thrilled that she's a vampire. He would be terrified that she's a vampire. He wouldn't know how to deal with it. He would have to help her. Elena would hate herself and project it on Damon. Elena would find that her connection with Damon is even deeper. I don't really know how to grasp the subject, but this is, like, the fic of my dreams. I'd love to write it, but I probably never will, because I have no idea how (believe me, I tried...), but I would totally read it, and hey, I can speculate the hell out of the subject.

And how about you? What's your deep, dark fanfic craving? What do you think about fics in which canon humans are turned into vampires? Because I also love the idea of vamp!Alaric, and I wouldn't say no to a good writer doing something about vamp!Wesley. Or perhaps there is someone who is also craving vamp!Elena as badly as I am, and you want to tell me all about it?

Comments

[dante-kent.livejournal.com]

(Fandom does that to people. And when it's real, you can't walk away. Why yes, I do in fact have a TVD quote for everything.)

"Security blanket" does sound a bit harsh, and I don't mean to undermine their relationship completely. I just think that they keep each other locked in this static position of what they think they should be, because if the other believes in the act, they can believe it themselves (the pronouns got a bit messy there, but hopefully you get the idea). But parachute is absolutely true too (Big Top is glorious, and ridiculously accurate). Because Stefan is safe and normal and totally acceptable to her friends and family, but Damon is terrifying. Elena doesn't resist her attraction to him out of guilt or loyalty (that's not the driving reason, at least) - it's because she can't handle what loving him might do to her. What it would make her admit about herself, how it would change her - I think Elena's petrified of how much she might actually be suited to Damon. Because Damon is clearly deranged, so if she matches him, well...

I think it's worse for Stefan because Elena's only being held back temporarily. She's stalling, but she's eventually going to figure it out and grow up. But Stefan is repressing, and has been denying himself for the better part of a century. That's not stalling, that's SERIOUS self-denial, but he never thought it was temporary. It wasn't like he figured he'd try this animal-blood, almost-human lifestyle for a while and then try to work up to being a functioning vampire. He NEVER intended to learn control. It's all or nothing with him, and Elena doesn't know any better, so she thinks encouraging him is what he needs, when it's sort of the opposite of what he needs. Damon was actually absolutely right about what Stefan needed to do, but because he's Damon, and he presents even his most rational thought processes like Damon, his path was never taken into consideration. This is SUCH a tangent. I'll stop.

[ever-neutral.livejournal.com]

I actually hate that quote b/c this fandom overuses it SO MUCH. And both the S/E and D/E sides seem to believe that that quote belongs to them exclusively. It's hilarious.

I just think that they keep each other locked in this static position of what they think they should be, because if the other believes in the act, they can believe it themselves (the pronouns got a bit messy there, but hopefully you get the idea).

Yessss, I do indeed. To expand on this--I don't think Elena chooses Stefan because he's necessarily the "safe" option. (He is safe, but in a different way.) I think Elena's insta-attraction back in S1 was dependent on the fact that he was an outsider, like her. He harboured a lot of guilt and pain and capacity for darkness, but he tried to be good. Elena's life was marked with Death, and then Death walked into her life again, but this time, Death was Good. That was the key. That was inspiring to Elena. They were both seeking the same thing (a new start, a place to belong), and they found it with each other, a way out of the darkness. BUT, of course, that only works insofar as the both of them remain free of darkness themselves.

So, yeah. What you said. I guess when I think of S/E and D/E, I have two completely different mental images. With S/E, it's the image of one person holding another's hand and leading them out of a dark room. With D/E, it's of two people sitting in that dark room together. I think you get the idea. Also, LOL @ this: Because Damon is clearly deranged, so if she matches him, well... -- Yes. Whichever way you look at it, Damon throws her off. WHICH IS WHY I LIKE THEM SO.

But Stefan is repressing, and has been denying himself for the better part of a century. That's not stalling, that's SERIOUS self-denial, but he never thought it was temporary.

WORD. It was seriously questionable for this 150+ vampire to put his life-endangering addiction in the hands of a teenage girl. Elena is boss, but she had NO CONCEPT of what it was like for him. How could she? Let's not buy into The Power of Love, dude.

[dante-kent.livejournal.com]

But the overused quotes are so much easier to remember! I'll try harder next time.

I like how you describe the genesis of S/E. I REALLY like the idea that the death in Stefan is what appeals to Elena. It makes sense - she's looking around at this world she used to belong in, where no one understands how lost and angry and guilty she feels, and here comes this guy who gets it, even feels it to a greater extent. To be clear, I have zero problem with Elena and her views of her relationship with Stefan for most of season 1. Stefan, I have more problems with, but again, neither here nor there.

BUT, of course, that only works insofar as the both of them remain free of darkness themselves.

This is SO key for me. Because I think the relationship starts to get really unhealthy right around when Stefan has his human blood relapse. Because Elena takes it all upon herself to get him through this, to be there for him, to be strong, and as much as she's wonderful for caring and trying and supporting him through anything, she is in WAY over her head (I still don't think she entirely realizes this, even after everything). She can't fix Stefan, much like she can't fix Damon. The problem is that, Stefan thinks she can. He believes in The Power of Love, poor guy, and he lets her take on his battle. And then the ship gets really problematic for me, because if these issues had been dealt with it would have been fascinating, but instead they carried on the charade of functional for another whole season.

I know your dark room image well, and it pleases me. I always liked dark rooms myself. :)

[upupa-epops.livejournal.com]

She can't fix Stefan, much like she can't fix Damon. The problem is that, Stefan thinks she can.

I don't think Stefan actually believes that. Stefan is not delusional about himself. He stays with Elena, because it brings him so much comfort it's hard for him to break up with her, but he knows it won't fix him. He lets her try to fix him, because it works for the time being, and that's enough for him.

Btw, when Stefan started drinking Elena's blood, it was SO disturbing for me. I honestly thought they'd go really dark from there.

[dante-kent.livejournal.com]

I completely agree that Stefan isn't delusional. I don't think he actually believes Elena can cure his blood addiction for him. Let me rephrase. What I DO think is that he believes she can keep him in the 'human' side of his personality. That as long as she loves him and sticks with him, he will be inspired enough to keep going with his diet and his rules and his justifications. His best chance to not be tempted is to stay with her, because she sees the good in him that he needs to believe he has. So no, Stefan doesn't think she can cure him of being a vampire (with a serious problem). But he thinks she can help him forget, for the most part. Which is why, once he slips, he thinks he can have nothing to do with her - because this whole illusion of normalcy was so tenuously balanced, and once one thing falls out of place he thinks the entire thing will fall apart.

To be honest, I'm a little confused about the blood-drinking plotline in S2. Where was that going? Yes, we had a moment reminding us that Elena will support Stefan, no matter what. But then what? It never really got mentioned again, and we never saw Stefan dealing with the tolerance build-up, and what was the point? I just don't get it.

[upupa-epops.livejournal.com]

Actually I like to use this s2 loophole to interpret some s3 things ;). Because if Stefan was drinking blood all the time (and in 2x21, when he gets stabbed by Damon, he drains the whole bag), then this whole "omg, he drinks blood and it makes him the Ripper" is just plain bullshit. Stefan is responsible for everything he does in s3.

[ever-neutral.livejournal.com]

Agreed, Elena does no wrong in S1 re: Stefan. Stefan is the dude who stalked, lied and manipulated her for months. BAD STEFAN, NO COOKIE. Yeesh. I appreciate the deconstruction this season, but I will never enjoy how they began.

I'm with upupa_epops about The Power of Love though--it's not that Stefan truly believes in it, but he allows himself to go along with it, because Elena's (naive) faith in him is so incredible and wonderful to him. I love their last scene in Blood Brothers right up until the end when Stefan decides not to off himself after all just b/c Elena gave him a pep talk, AND THEN HE'S CURED JUST LIKE THAT. Um. NO. That is not how addiction works. Thank Jesus the writers were actually aware of that after all.

DAMON/ELENA IS ALL ABOUT DARK ROOMS. It's fine. It's good.

[dante-kent.livejournal.com]

AND NONE FOR STEFAN SALVATORE, BYE.

I tried to clarify what I meant about TPoL above - it's not that Stefan actually believes Elena can rid him of his addiction problems, it's that he thinks she can keep him from succumbing to temptation. She lets him subscribe to the doctrine of self-denial because she doesn't know any better, so he thinks that as long as he has her to allow him to think he's human, he can hold out against his darker urges. He completely relies on her to keep him on program, basically. He entangles everything he wants to be in Elena's love for him, effectively making it her responsibility. He wants to be what he's made her think he is. He knows, deep down, that it does't work like that, but he HOPES he can believe it does for as long as possible (and now that his construction has collapsed, he has no idea how to get back from his downward spiral. He can't bear to drag himself back to the man he wants to be, because he's never had to do it himself before, and he doesn't know who to rely on now. I vote Katherine, because that would be awesome - and it wouldn't really work, and that would be even more awesome.).

[upupa-epops.livejournal.com]

He entangles everything he wants to be in Elena's love for him, effectively making it her responsibility.

THIS. That's the problem with the Salvatore boys and Elena. She tends to take too much responsibility, and Stefan and Damon don't exactly oppose. Soon there might be too much on her shoulders.

[ever-neutral.livejournal.com]

He can't bear to drag himself back to the man he wants to be, because he's never had to do it himself before, and he doesn't know who to rely on now. I vote Katherine, because that would be awesome - and it wouldn't really work, and that would be even more awesome.).

WORD. Let's do it.