So. Like you said, Elena is very self-conscious around Damon, and this self-consciousness only increases when she discovers how he really feels about her. Prior to 2x01, she never entertained the prospect. But once Damon makes his feelings clear, the {idea} that she COULD reciprocate starts bugging her. It starts leading to her doing things like kissing Stefan in front of Damon (2x03) because she feels the need to ~prove that she and Damon will never happen. At the same time, she starts learning to wield her emotional power over him (now HEIGHTENED because of him being in love with her), as you described.
Things start *getting very confusing in Elena's mental landscape*. She has to put A LOT of effort into mentally cordoning Damon off, for various reasons (the neck-snapping, his unrequited love). But there's a huge cognitive dissonance there. For instance, note the way she treats Matt compared to how she treats Damon. Hilariously, she was actually IN A ROMANTIC R/SHIP with Matt, and it doesn't even compare. The sheer level of intensity in her r/ship with Damon (the compassion, the hate, the sheer amount of effort it takes to keep him at arm's length) is something that really fucks her up. He's able to affect her more than just about everybody else in her life--even Stefan. Because her feelings for Stefan are solid, and constant, like a straight line, whereas her feelings for Damon are UP AND DOWN AND UP AND DOWN, and it fucks her up because he simply shouldn't have that much emotional power over her. She has to put all her energy into NOT FEELING ANYTHING with him, because her default mode with him is feeling too much. (Funnily enough, I think this is what actually accounts for the rock-solid-ness of Elena/Stefan in S2. If Damon weren't in the picture causing chaos, I think her r/ship with Stefan would be far less stable. But that's another tangent.)
SO. Elena's main Damon-related dilemma in S2: the cognitive dissonance she experiences between a) not wanting his feelings, and b) struggling not to be affected by those feelings. And this is how Elena's (unconscious) romantic feelings for Damon come about. BASIC PHYSICS, TROLOLOL. Whatever draws or presses another is as much drawn or pressed by that other. The way that Damon loves Elena is so overwhelming that she can't NOT be affected by it. Take "I will always choose you". In that moment? Elena feels something back. (Nina portrays this pretty clearly, IMO.) It's not that she reciprocates the sentiment, because she doesn't choose him, clearly; rather, what she is deeply affected by is THE FEELING. This is the same sort of ~reaction that happens on Damon's deathbed and which leads her to declare that she likes him as he is. It's not that the sentiment is true across the board, but the feeling is real.
... IDK if any of that made any sense at all. ARGUE WITH ME.
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timeasmymeasure
Elena's attraction to Damon in S2
Date: 2011-12-15 07:03 am (UTC)Things start *getting very confusing in Elena's mental landscape*. She has to put A LOT of effort into mentally cordoning Damon off, for various reasons (the neck-snapping, his unrequited love). But there's a huge cognitive dissonance there. For instance, note the way she treats Matt compared to how she treats Damon. Hilariously, she was actually IN A ROMANTIC R/SHIP with Matt, and it doesn't even compare. The sheer level of intensity in her r/ship with Damon (the compassion, the hate, the sheer amount of effort it takes to keep him at arm's length) is something that really fucks her up. He's able to affect her more than just about everybody else in her life--even Stefan. Because her feelings for Stefan are solid, and constant, like a straight line, whereas her feelings for Damon are UP AND DOWN AND UP AND DOWN, and it fucks her up because he simply shouldn't have that much emotional power over her. She has to put all her energy into NOT FEELING ANYTHING with him, because her default mode with him is feeling too much. (Funnily enough, I think this is what actually accounts for the rock-solid-ness of Elena/Stefan in S2. If Damon weren't in the picture causing chaos, I think her r/ship with Stefan would be far less stable. But that's another tangent.)
SO. Elena's main Damon-related dilemma in S2: the cognitive dissonance she experiences between a) not wanting his feelings, and b) struggling not to be affected by those feelings. And this is how Elena's (unconscious) romantic feelings for Damon come about. BASIC PHYSICS, TROLOLOL. Whatever draws or presses another is as much drawn or pressed by that other. The way that Damon loves Elena is so overwhelming that she can't NOT be affected by it. Take "I will always choose you". In that moment? Elena feels something back. (Nina portrays this pretty clearly, IMO.) It's not that she reciprocates the sentiment, because she doesn't choose him, clearly; rather, what she is deeply affected by is THE FEELING. This is the same sort of ~reaction that happens on Damon's deathbed and which leads her to declare that she likes him as he is. It's not that the sentiment is true across the board, but the feeling is real.
... IDK if any of that made any sense at all. ARGUE WITH ME.