Damon Top Ten Drama Queen Moments
Nov. 13th, 2011 04:15 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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goldy_dollar put me up to this. I regret nothing.WARNING: This post contains spoilers and Damon's facial expressions.
(in no particular order)
1. Damon/Fireplace OTP
Damon probably has a separate set of glasses that serve the sole purpose of being thrown into the fireplace. And if he doesn't, he totally should. Throwing alcohol into the fireplace is one of the best ways to deal with stress. It is known.
2. Wrong boy toy!
Katherine: Mason. You should have been here an hour ago.
Damon: Wrong boy toy!
Katherine: Damon. For once you've surprised me. I assume Mason's with you.
Damon: He's right beside me. Although his heart's across the room.
Katherine: You shouldn't have.
Damon: I've had a very busy day today. Killed a werewolf, found a moonstone. Hey, did you know that he hid the moonstone in a bottom of a well full of vervain? Guess he didn't
trust you very much. He did love you. Poor guy. Hey, where are you, 'cause, you know, I could bring him over. Last good-byes and all that.
Katherine: You have no idea what you've just done.
Damon: Aww, did I put a kink in your master plan? I'm so sorry.
Katherine: Do you honestly believe That I don't have a plan B?
Because when you destroy your enemy's Diabolical Plan, calling them and GLOATING about it is totally the mature thing to do. It's not at all about having a Great Dramatic Triumph Scene. No, sir!
BONUS: Judgy Stefan
3. Existential crisis
Jessica: What happened?
Damon: I'm...Lost.
Jessica: And you're laying in the middle of the road?
Damon: Not that kind of lost. Metaphorically. Existentially.
Jessica: Do you need help?
Damon: Well... Yes, I do. Can you help me?
Jessica: You're drunk.
Damon: No. Uh, well, yes, a little maybe. No, please don't leave. I really do need help.
Jessica: Don't move. I don't want any trouble.
Damon: Neither do I. But it's all I got is trouble.
Jessica: Why can't I move?
Damon: What's your name?
Jessica: Jessica.
Damon: Hi, Jessica. I have a secret. I have a big one. But I never said it out loud. I mean, what's the point? It's not going to change anything. To make me good. Make me adopt a puppy. I can't be what other people want me to be. What she wants me to be. This is who I am, Jessica.
Jessica: Are you going to hurt me?
Damon: I'm not sure. Because you... You're my existential crisis. Do I kill you? Do I not kill you?
Jessica: Please don't.
Damon: But I have to, Jessica. Because I'm not human. And I miss it. I miss it more than anything in the world! That's my secret. But there's only so much hurt a man can take.
Jessica: Please don't.
THIS. I don't even know how to comment. Getting drunk, sitting in the middle of a road, delivering an Epic Speech to a random girl, and then killing her. You just don't get more melodramatic. And Damon should know. He tried.
(Also, chapeux bas for Damon. When I'm drunk, I can't say the word Existentially without adding or losing a vowel)
4. Clean Freak
Damon: Well, try harder. We need him to kill Klaus so I can de-rippefy Stefan before he destroys my house.
Katherine: Fine. I'll give it another shot.
And, of course, a classic:
Damon: Hey, the two brunettes on the staircase owe me a Persian rug.
Because this is his biggest problem right now. Yep. Obviously.
5. Shot by Logan Fell
Stefan: What happened? you ok?
Damon: No. I'm not ok. I was ambushed. I was shot. Now i'm vengeful. Just gotta find him.
Ok, getting shot earns a guy a little drama, but the way he's taking off his shirt is just a show itself. He is ANGRY. In case you didn't notice. ANGRY. And vengeful.
6. Right away, Miss Katherine
Katherine: We're missing the party. I'll have one of those.
Damon: Right away, miss Katherine.
And again, totally The Mature Thing To Do. Let's get easily provoked and stake Katherine, consequences be damned! If it's poetic, it's a valid lifestyle choice. Also: he's so over her. Every fibre of his being says how much he's over her. Totally.
7. It's ok to be twelve!
Damon: It's a full moon tonight, Elena.
Elena: Then we'll find him before then. Damon, please.
Damon: Ok. Ok. But we are out of here before the moon is full and I'm werewolf bait.
Elena: I promise.
Damon: Unless you wanna relive that whole deathbed kissy thing.
Elena: I said I promise.
Damon: Fine.
When you are confused and embarassed, because a girl of your dreams kissed you when you were on your deathbed, and then you blew the whole dying thing, deal with your emotions by following the girl to the Smoky Mountains and pushing her into a stream! You've been a grown-up for over 150 years, so you can tell that it does get boring. When pushing her into a stream gets boring too, you can always pull her hair and draw a penis in her history book.
Bonus if you do all that when Evil Masterminds are after you.
8. Sweet, innocent Damon
True Love is absolute, so Damon just kisses the girl whose mouth is covered in blood, and it's all about making a romantic gesture. The girl he loves by definition cannot do anything apalling, so if he feels disgusted, then there is something wrong with him. Of course this attitude lead him to his doom, but at least he made it into such a beautifully staged tragedy!
9. Our bond is unbreakable!
Damon: We got a crazy ex on the loose. Better watch out, looks like Katherine's trying to steal your guy.
Stefan: That's not what's happening.
Damon: Isn't it? I mean, it's only fair since I went after your girl.
Elena: I'm gonna check on Jenna and Jeremy. Let me know when you guys are done.
Damon: So what's it gonna be, huh? Fight to the death? Go ahead, make your threats, stake your claim.
Stefan: I'm not going to fight you.
Damon: Why? I'd fight me!
Stefan: Katherine is going to try to play us against each other. You do know that, right?
Damon: Brother, don't you worry! Our bond is unbreakable!
Stefan: We need to stay united against her! So yes, as much as I would like to kill you, I'm not gonna fight you.
Damon: I kissed Elena.
Stefan: Because you feel something for her! Because you actually care. And I'm not gonna let Katherine come in here and destroy that part of you that is finally, after all this time, willing to feel something. She'll try to break you. She'll try to break us. And how we respond to that will define us. It's our choice. So no, I'm not gonna fight you.
Saying dramatic things is way better than actually solving conflicts. And with all the gestures! This is one of the few moments when Damon lets his Drama Show become Self-Mocking Drama Show on purpose.
10. I can't be selfish with you
Damon: I just have to say something.
Elena: Why do you have to say it with my necklace?
Damon: Well... Because what I'm about to say is... Probably the most selfish thing I've ever said in my life.
Elena: Damon, don't go there.
Damon: No. I just have to say it once. You just need to hear it. I love you, Elena. And it's because I love you that I can't be selfish with you... Why you can't know this. I don't deserve you... But my brother does. God, I wish you didn't have to forget this. But you do.
This is one of the most dramatic Damon moments, because, seriously, the very need to just GO TO THE GIRL and have the EPIC ROMANTIC LOVE SPEECH is drama!queen!Damon to the core. And then he says things like I can't be selfish with you while doing something awfully selfish, and he is aware of it, but he still needs the performance to happen.
How about other Drama Queen moments? I'm sure you have some more, especially since I tried not to be very cruel ;).
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Date: 2011-11-13 03:25 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-11-13 03:28 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-11-13 04:22 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-11-13 06:15 am (UTC)&& neat-freak!drama queen Damon may just be my favorite thing ever; I STILL laugh at the scene where he's begging Vickki not to get blood on the couch (in 1x06), and the one where he rolls up the carpet before torturing Mason in 2x06 because OF COURSE HE DOESN'T WANT TO GET BLOOD ON THE RUG, DUH BONNIE LOL
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Date: 2011-11-13 06:43 am (UTC)I SNORTED AT THIS BIT:
When pushing her into a stream gets boring too, you can always pull her hair and draw a penis in her history book.
Also you have completely nailed the 'I love you/forget' moment. SUCH A CLASSIC DRAMA QUEEN MOVE. SO much love.
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Date: 2011-11-13 08:57 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-11-13 09:00 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-11-13 09:09 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-11-13 10:02 am (UTC)There are loads and loads of drama queen moments, but one I like is 2.22 where Damon ~dramatically~ tries to kill himself by taking off his ring and standing with his arms outstretched in front of the sunlit window. Gotta go out with a bang, y'know?
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Date: 2011-11-13 10:05 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-11-13 05:02 pm (UTC)*snorts* Damon I do love you but you're such a drama queen indeed. My favorites have to be the persian rug ones/when he loses his shit over stuff getting all over his furniture because I can't help finding it hilarious to an insane degree, but everything else is the best. Also LOL the bonus judging!Stefan killed me. I might like current!Stefan atm but I sort of miss the bitchfaces he made when Damon went all drama queen. And gosh 100% right about the last one. But ALL OF THEM. Also Ian's face = thing of beauty. Seriously. This post is worthy of a lot of internets.
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Date: 2011-11-13 05:24 pm (UTC)Neat!freak!Damon wins all the awards. I love it. Damon is a vampire, a murderer, a rapist, a cruel, vicious creature, unpredictable and overly emotional, and on top of that he is just... petty? So much about being a romantic hero. His pettiness humanizes him so much.
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Date: 2011-11-13 07:41 pm (UTC)THIS POST WAS WELL WORTH IT, I LOVE ALL YOUR MOMENTS. IA with Damon/Fireplace OTP. I think him throwing his glass into the fireplace is one of my all-time favourite moments. YOU DESTROY THAT SHOT GLASS DAMON, YEAH.
Ok, getting shot earns a guy a little drama, but the way he's taking off his shirt is just a show itself
hahaha the people at home consider this an acceptable response to the situation. CARRY ON DRAMATIC DAMON.
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Date: 2011-11-13 09:51 pm (UTC)Damon throwing glasses was supposed to have a bonus Damon throwing soapbars around his bathroom, but it was 4AM, so I just gave up, especially since I only remember it was SOMEWHERE around mid-s2 XD.
DAMON SHOULD BE DRAMATIC ALL THE TIME!
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Date: 2011-11-13 10:02 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-11-13 10:22 pm (UTC)Damon/Fireplace = MY OTP FOREVER AND EVER. Do you think Stefan hides all the really expensive crystal stuff, just in case?
Judgy Stefan in the greatest. I have nothing left to say.
Neatfreak!Damon has stolen my heart. I have developed an extensive headcanon in which he folds laundry, polishes the silver, and waters all the plants. He is a domestic at heart. How else do you explain that soap dish?
This list is gold. And valid. Let's just say that if at some point Damon actually stomps his foot in a hissy fit, well, I will not be surprised.
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Date: 2011-11-13 10:37 pm (UTC)Do you think Stefan hides all the really expensive crystal stuff, just in case?
I think it's Damon who does it when he is having Reasonable Moments XD. Come on, have you ever seen Stefan doing household stuff?
I have developed an extensive headcanon in which he folds laundry, polishes the silver, and waters all the plants.
He totally does. Come on, he is a vampire, he doesn't work, he doesn't go to school, he doesn't troll the internet (or does he?), and eating people only takes that much time. He has to do SOMETHING!
This list was a great fun to make :D. I'm glad you enjoyed it!
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Date: 2011-11-13 10:38 pm (UTC)LOOOOL. I was all silly and romantic, and I thought he did it for ARTISTIC reasons, but screw it. I LIKE YOUR EXPLANATION BETTER!
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Date: 2011-11-13 11:09 pm (UTC)I think it's Damon who does it when he is having Reasonable Moments XD.
Valid point. He probably locks them up and hides the key somewhere, just to deter Drama!Damon from smashing the valuables. Depending on his dedication, he sometimes sticks the key in the vervain.
He has to do SOMETHING!
Fact. Damon does not handle boredom well. And hey, that house is big. What else does he do all day? Though I'm pretty sure he does troll the internet. He probably Bings things all the time.
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Date: 2011-11-13 11:18 pm (UTC)Depending on his dedication, he sometimes sticks the key in the vervain.
LOL, yes! Or he gave Alaric the key just in case! Though it probably would be enough if Damon just hid the key (or the crystals!) in a place that is far from the fireplace. If you have to grab the glass, and then go downstairs and across, like, five rooms in order to properly throw the damned tumbler into the fireplace, it just ruins the ENTIRE dramatic effect.
He probably Bings things all the time.
Don't they all? XD
Damon should have a livejournal. He would be doing memes all the time.
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Date: 2011-11-13 11:36 pm (UTC)Also, man you totally forgot my fog/crow OTP in the first episode! Drama queen Damon is always more dramatic when she/he?lol? makes an entrance. Y'a know they all have to know who Damon is!!!
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Date: 2011-11-14 12:04 am (UTC)Also: you posted this comment when I was looking for a picture of the crow to post in a different entry XD. Agreed, Drama Queen Damon definitely is an attention seeker who can't resist making an entrance.
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Date: 2011-11-14 12:45 am (UTC)I don't know, it's some thing I heard about on the internet. It's probably not real.
This is fast becoming a fic that needs to happen. I can see Damon reaching for the nice crystal, realizing it ISN'T THERE, and then stomping around the house to get to his hiding place. And once he gets the key, he feels all dejected, because the moment is gone, and he has to wait for the next existential crisis to shatter the nice crystal. So he goes to Stefan's room and knocks all the books off the shelf, just for good measure.
DAMON WOULD HAVE THE BEST LJ. I feel like he would be obsessed with making icons. And he'd gifspam EVERYONE. It would be glorious. I'd friend him.
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Date: 2011-11-14 12:55 am (UTC)This is fast becoming a fic that needs to happen. I can see Damon reaching for the nice crystal, realizing it ISN'T THERE, and then stomping around the house to get to his hiding place. And once he gets the key, he feels all dejected, because the moment is gone, and he has to wait for the next existential crisis to shatter the nice crystal. So he goes to Stefan's room and knocks all the books off the shelf, just for good measure.
I NEED THIS TO HAPPEN IN THE SHOW! Or in a fic. Preferably both.
DAMON WOULD HAVE THE BEST LJ. I feel like he would be obsessed with making icons. And he'd gifspam EVERYONE. It would be glorious. I'd friend him.
LOOOOL. Now it makes so much sense that he looks down on Stefan. Damon's journal is better. It has gifs! And, judging from the way Damon was reading Twilight, he would just be one merry troll. With gifspam.
Damon's lj. Now, this is another fic that HAS TO happen.
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Date: 2011-11-14 01:38 am (UTC)Also terms I've heard thrown about. I should probably urban dictionary them.
Now it makes so much sense that he looks down on Stefan. Damon's journal is better.
IT ALL MAKES SENSE NOW. Damon is fiercely proud of his LJ, but Stefan has just as many flisters. And it makes Damon RAGE, because Stefan's journal is the worst. It doesn't even have a design. It's just default. Default. Damon has an entire section of his own LJ dedicated to Stefan Fails. Obviously, many are gifs. Take that, Stefan. You don't even know how to make icons.
THESE FICS MUST HAPPEN. The world will be better for it.